Betrayed, Used, and Royally Pissed
by LeTimbo
Summary: After the final battle, Harry reflects on the war and his life. Longer version hopefully coming...The longer the story gets the more philosophical the story will get, bringing in...Buddhism. Fixed to make it somewhat postHBP.
1. Chapter 1

A/N Yes, I am back in the world of FanFiction. This does not mean that I will necessarily be updating Betrayal…I just think that there are much better stories out there with the same ideas I've got in there. So, barring some sudden plot bunny, that will remain un-updated for a while longer. As usual, I don't own the HP characters and have no desire to make any sort of money out of these ramblings, so don't sue.

Betrayed.

No other word sums it up.

Betrayed.

Betrayed AND used. That's a better summary.

Betrayed, used, and royally pissed off. That's even better.

Maybe I should have listened to that damndable hat so many years ago and had it put me in Slytherin. At least them I would have been prepared to be betrayed and used. It wouldn't hurt as much as it does…did…does…who can tell anymore.

And I've got all the time in the world to think about it. I did what the world commanded of me, and in a _lovely_ showing of appreciation decide that if I could do it, then I must be even worse than him, so they ought to preemptively lock me up. In Azkaban. To rot with the dementors and death-eating scum who I struggled against for soooo long.

At least I don't pass out from them anymore. I got over than in my sixth year. I've seen too many horrors in real life to be bothered with imaginary horrors from something that looks like one of Snape's cloaks only animated. People used to visit…I just loved it when that traitorous former friend of mine Ronald "It's for your own good, really" Weasly dropped by to try and convince me of the altruistic reasons behind their decision to lock me up. If anything, traitors should be locked up, rather than those who risked their ass to save theirs. Ungrateful swine.

Another dementor passes by, and I shoot it another glare as it scurries away. I don't even hear the other prisoners' screams anymore. They may be dead, they may have been let out, maybe I just have learned to tune them out…or maybe I went deaf.

No…I heard the metal bowl with the water clang against the stone floor. Not deaf. Pity…that would have made life maybe just a tad more interesting.

Could I escape? I'm fairly certain I could. But where would I go? What would I do? Merlin knows how long I've been here…I stopped counting after the first year. I haven't a clue where I would go…much less how I would survive once I got there. I'm sure Traitor Weasly would have looted every last knut out of my family vault. Why I ever let him talk me into sharing it with his family during the war after Arthur was murdered is beyond me.

So many deaths. Arthur would have at least attempted to keep my out of Azkaban. He died a good year before the final battle. Molly was just so crushed…who knows if she ever pulled out of it. Ginny told me once that she had to take 7 potions a day just to function as a shell of her former self. Hard to imagine why, with what she went through. As if losing her husband was bad enough, having one of your own sons as the one responsible defys explanation. That damn Percy couldn't have even used the Killing Curse…he had to result to less…clean…ways. Looking back I was certainly not surprised he ended up joining Riddle. It was a slippery slope after his first appointment into Fudge's office, and he was so blinded by ambition that even an ugly, painful tattoo that bound him to serve Riddle was no cost in becoming Minister of Magic someday. The trial showed that Riddle had Percy hatchet his father as proof that Percy had the "bullocks" to be Minister one day. Riddle was a master at manipulation. I'll give him that much.

Speaking of master manipulators…I often wonder if Dumbledore would have been able to keep me out of here. It seemed like a national, if not worldwide, movement to condemn me after all. It would have taken more than his work. Even if he would have believed me over them. Our relationship was just too strained after that _lovely_ fifth year to reconcile. Sure, we were allies, and if it weren't for his sacrifice I may not have been able to finish off Riddle once and for all.

Many sacrifices which led to many noble deaths. But for every noble sacrifice there were just as many people sacrificed to save their own hides. I'll never forget Ginny Weasley, who I thought I knew so well, throwing Luna Lovegood in front of her to separate her from Tom. Sure, it gave Ginny enough time to get her ass out of the line of fire, but as what cost? Shouldn't she be in here instead of me? But, alas, no, she's lauded as a hero and given a cushy job in the Ministry, no doubt. When I was thrown in here the Ministry was in shambles anyways…I'm sure they hired every student coming out of Hogwarts to work for them, no matter the cost.

It seems whenever I close my eyes I see blood. I see death. The "Final Battle," as the scavengers in the press called it the next day, was the bloodiest thing I think I could ever imagine. Killing curses either weren't working, or were discarded for more…personal…forms of murder and revenge. After all, I had to lop off Riddle's head with the Sword of Gryffindor, while chanting this bloody obscure ritual to cleanse the soul of evil. That neck gushed blood all over me. I was covered in blood, which made for great pictures the next day, of which I am quite certain caused me to land in here. Seeing their savior coated in the blood of his worst foe could cause the sheep (otherwise known as the readers of the Daily Prophet) to become slightly disillusioned. I'm no fool…I understand why they were afraid. Its just too bad they were completely wrong about it.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: So maybe this won't be a oneshot. Thanks for the reviews! I had gallbladder surgery this week and am recuperating nicely from it. I've got some time this week to work on it, so here I go. I'll try to update regularly, but it most certainly won't be every day. As usual, I own nothing of this and am making no money…you'd know if I was. All that belongs to, well, JK Rowling, Scholastic, Warner Brothers…someone or another. I'm beginning to rather like this story, which is good. It means I'm likely to update it.

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Betrayed, Used and Royally Pissed. 

By LeTimbo

Chapter 2

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You know, it's not the dementors that bother me the most here. It's not even the food. It's the lack of any intellectual conversation outside my own head. 

Hermione.

She was always good for a smart conversation, when she wasn't nagging me about studying or whatever else was going on. I never appreciated it when in school, but as the war went on I began to appreciate it more. The discussion of the ethics of our side, and the means we were using. We rarely agreed, but it made it all the more interesting. We both could have gone to Université de la Claudia de la Sorcellerie, the top university located in Paris, but with the war we thought there were more important things to be doing than study for 5 more years when we could have easily been killed before we had a chance to graduate. After Hogwarts we worked full time for the order, from strategy to raids, and the constant, nonstop training, but we were able to at least once a day sit down and have some sort of academic argument about something going on in the war, from strategy to politics.

Merlin how I miss those arguments. They made the darkness of the war seem bearable. Who would have ever thought I, Harry James Potter, would be saying he misses nerdy chats? I guess it shows just how much the war changed all of us out of Hogwarts.

We all knew what we were up against, and what our futures held for us, when we graduated. The graduation itself was a subdued affair, with the first major attack on Diagon Alley the day prior. We knew that those career goals we decided on in fifth year were pointless. There were no career options until the war was over, for either side. It was kill or be killed. There were no neutrals, and any so called neutral was killed by one side or the other. I know we didn't trust so called neutrals. How could anyone be neutral in the face of evil? If they were content to let evil take over, then they were no better than the Death Eaters. I wasn't on the squad that "dealt" with neutrals, but everyone knew what they were in charge of. After what I assume are years in this place, I realize we were just as bad as the Death Eaters when it came to this…Hermione was right. Shocker there.

Hermione.

Merlin I miss her. With her academics she may have been able to keep me out of here too. But she fell.

That hurts the worst. She stood by my side in the Final Battle, and she fell from a vampire who was on its way to try and turn me. I slaughtered that vampire with Gryffindor's sword, decapitating it before I hunted down Riddle, but it was little consolation. The White and Reds took her away, and I never saw her again. After she was gone, I was numb on the inside. I had to end the war, at all costs, just to honor her memory and honor her sacrifice.

Sure, she ended up dating Ron off and on after graduation, but that never stopped me loving her. Sometimes it was a brother-sisterly love, and sometimes something a little more intense. Who knows if she ever picked up on my seeming unrequited love? I just hope she's with her parents now, killed by Malfoy Senior in our seventh year, having a big party with my parents, Sirius, Remus, Dumbledore, and everyone else we lost in those final years.

Remus. Killed by the silver hand of Wormtail in my seventh year, while he was our DADA professor no less. Wormtail slipped in through a secret passage, and as a rat stabbed Remus with his silver paw. We caught him too late to save Remus, but before he could get to me or Dumbledore. I think he ended up being Kissed…he wasn't seen again, that's all I know. And I got to have 5 minutes alone with him after capturing him. That brought out my true dark side.

Another clang, bread time. I guess it's lucky that the Durselys kept me starving growing up. These meals remind me of my childhood. Some crusty, moldy, disgusting bread and just enough water to survive. Ah, the memories of just a stellar childhood. Not that it didn't prepare me for the cold future. The bitterness helped motivate me to train harder, and the experience helped me survive in life. And now it's making me realize they actually prepared me for current life. Granted, I'm imprisoned, but at least they prepared me for it with their imprisonment of me in my childhood. Well, was I ever a child? In my youth. I wonder what happened to the Durselys? After that summer before my sixth year, I never saw them again. If they were ever told I was imprisoned, I'm sure they were glad and thrilled to finally have their criminal relative behind bars.

Pacing in the cell helps keep at least some of my muscles together. I was proud of how I looked after all of that training. Walking, pushups, sit-ups, whatever I can do in my tiny cell.

Training. That's all we did after Hogwarts. That and plan and strategize. The trainers always separated us into pairs to train us. They didn't put me with Hermione and Ron, who they separated as well. They didn't want best friends or lovers together because of possible liabilities. I completely understood, as I would have jumped in front of a Crucio for either Hermione or Ron, well, at the time. I was surprised when they paired me with Neville, but the children of the prophecy stuck together even in the end. He's the only one that stood by me at that sham trial, but because of that they refuse to let him near me. Hell, maybe they even jailed him too. I wouldn't know.

But I'm sure Hermione would have, if she would have been alive for it. She hated the mistreatment of others, and you can't get any more mistreated than me. I don't know how Ron could have disrespected her memory so easily. They seemed to be in love, yet at the trial I know I saw him wearing a ring. The same ring I've seen every time he visits to mock the famed Harry Potter. It's most definitely a wedding ring. He never told me who the unlucky girl was, but whoever she is or was or whatever I hope she realizes she married a traitor, and nothings stopping him from betraying her like he betrayed me. If I never see that man, that boy, that slime, again before I die it would still be too soon.

Hmm. It can't be healthy for me to have all of that anger bottled up in me. One day I'm sure it'll just explode out onto someone who may very well not deserve it. At the same time, how can I not be angry at someone who betrayed me? At a society that found it necessary to imprison me for doing what they wanted me to do?

I remember one of the last times my anger exploded…excluding the Final Battle after Hermione died. It was in the end of my sixth year, and I just…snapped. Poor Colin. The combination of that horrible fifth year, Sirius's death, the constant attacks and newspaper editorials wondering why I wasn't stopping them, especially since many of them had notes to me left on the walls…sometimes they used blood, sometimes other human remains. Ron was having his usual fight with me…complaining that I was getting unfair treatment for whatever reason he felt like complaining about that term. Colin was in the DA and wanted to take a picture and I just snapped. I'm lucky I didn't get expelled for that tirade. He was patched up just fine and the next day, after feeling horrible all night, I went to apologize he was in high sprits. I never confirmed it, but some people were whispering that he thought it was pretty, ugh, hot, that I beat the tar out of him. But hey, whatever floats your boat.

Another clang. That's the sound of another cell opening and closing. Another death, inmate-comrade, or someone's term is up. That's another thing I can't seem to remember. How long I was sentenced for. I barely remember that circus of a trial. I knew the trial was a sham and the "blue ribbon jury" had it in for me. As soon as they arrested me I knew that I would be in here for a long time. But how long…

Not that it really matters. Like I could ever have a life after this anyways.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: So I'm watching my college, Georgia Tech, get demolished in the NCAA Basketball Tourney, and I needed something to ease the pain, so here we are, on my roomie's laptop, and going to start the story. That's why this chapter came out so soon, and you can thank Louisville for it. I don't own anything other than my pain, both gallbladder and basketball. And another quick note: I am completely, totally, 100, absolutely blocked on Betrayal…It's not going to be updated for a long while. So enjoy this one :-) And if you like it, leave a review. They are really motivating me…and if you put this on any C2 group, leave me a review to let me know!

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Betrayed, Used, and Royally Pissed  
By LeTimbo  
Chapter 3

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_-Confusicate! _

_No Neville, make the arm motion more fluid. Remember what Stalwart told us. More fluid arm movements mean you can rattle off the next one faster._

_-Ok Harry, good point... CONFUSICATE!_

_Much better Neville. You know, I was wondering for a long time why they stuck us together as partners. But I see it now. If I was with Hermione or Ron I would be too worried about protecting them. I see us more as equals, so I don't have to protect you all the time._

_-Thanks Harry. Ok. Time for some partner spells. Biprotego's up first. On the count of three._

_One..Two..Three._

_BIPROTEGO!_

_-That looks like a stronger double shield than normal. Good job Harry._

_Thanks Neville. Next up, the stunner sphere. On the count of three._

_-One..Two..Three._

_STUDEFLY_

_Good job Neville. I think that was a pretty good warm up._

_-Agreed. So, what next before the trainers call us in. Tactics? We haven't covered it in a while, and I've got a jut feeling it'll be covered again soon._

_Ok. We apparate into an unknown room other than we know that an attack is happening. First step?_

_-Ascertain the amount of hostile individuals and entrances and exits in the room._

_Right on. And ascertain? You been taking lessons from Hermione?_

_-Cute Harry._

_I know, but you know the rule, no relationships between partners_

_-Droll even._

_See, there you go again Hermione. Best method to incapacitate an enemy?_

_-Physical retraining devices. Magical means can be undone._

_What about putting them in incapacitating pain? Or death?_

_-Pain can be overcome with a strong enough emotion or the right spell. Death, albeit permanent, takes too much energy to cast versus the other means on incapacitation._

_Right Neville._

_-Ok. You two seem warmed enough. I think we'll covering tracking, as neither of you seem to have noticed my arrival._

_-Trainer Johnson. _

_-Neville, Harry. Lets get started…_

The clang of the bread bowl wakes me up. I have a lot of dreams about those days we were training. It was all I was able, allowed even, to think about for such along time, its no wonder my subconscious decides to review it almost every night. Better that then the nightmares I had immediately after the final battle. Watching Hermione fall. Blood covering me after defeating Riddle. Disgusting Dreams.

Those times with Neville were pretty darn great, especially considering the times we were in. Training constantly, either in the old HQ, the Ministry or Hogwarts. It was always interesting, albeit repetitive, always learning new spells, new tactics. The paired partners and the trainers. We rarely had courses with other partner pairs, so we were never sure what training we had compared to others. Me and Neville always had a feeling we were getting much more advanced training than the others, and boy that turned out to be true. When we did our first partner spell in combat, everybody froze and stared at us, obviously wondering what in the hell we had just done. Luckily, that hesitation gave me and Neville the time needed to incapacitate the rest of the Death Eaters in the room. By the time the other partners realized we had finished the job, we had already gone to our next stop after the cleanup crew arrived.

It really was an ingenious system they had set up for these raids. Each pair had a specialized watch that had a twin watch back at the war room. They would charm the twin watch and our watch would become a portkey to the next location that needed help. There was never a reliable way to ward against portkeys, only apparition. The Department of Mysteries and our own research team came up with the watches, and it helped change the course of the war, even though it was extremely stressful on the partners. We rarely got a beak between raids and battles during our shift. Neville and me of course ended up with the busiest evening shift, but we survived.

We spent most of the war in those immediate counteractions based off either intelligence reports or emergency fire calls, until the research team could find a way to finally kill Riddle. Every night there were attacks, either from death eaters or dark creatures, although only some nights were truly raid-hopping. We were stunned at first how quickly Riddle had recruited after the DOM fiasco, but he recruited heavily outside Britain for help. We did our best to recruit people as well, but whenever our methods of winning the war were published, it convinced more and more that the lines between the two sides were really indeed blurred, and probably helped push more into Riddle's ranks.

Neville.

We were equals out on the battle field, although we were the only ones who saw it that way most of the time. Everybody assumed that I was in charge of the pair, even though he had a brilliant mind when it came to field operations. He never took it badly, even though I did. He deserved the credit he rarely got. Still, we were the most successful team in the Order or in the Ministry, and he knew his worth.

I think we reached a state beyond simple friendship. We were partners – we rarely talked about personal problems, and when we did it was only in the sense of our emotions at the time. Emotions can screw around with spells, and your partner has to know what to expect. We were responsible for each other in combat, fighting along side each other, more often back to back, and just total equals. We were comrades, a step above friends it seems. Comrades last longer than friends.

We were never really great friends at Hogwarts. Even with the DOM debacle, we never really got close. We tried, but he always seemed like the odd one out in the guys dorm. Me and Ron, Seamus and Dean. Neville had his closest friends the year below us and in Hufflepuff House. But he showed true loyalty, which was an asset in the field.

Time for the pushups. I may be the first person in Azkaban's history to be more buff after admittance than before. I've always been skinny, even more so now. Training did put a little muscle on me, but I've certainly got more now than when I came in.

Every day it's the same training regime in here. First, physical training with the pushups and sit-ups, jumping jacks and stretching. Then the magical training. I don't want to let either my body or my magic start to atrophy from inactivity. We were prepped in the war training on how to protect ourselves from atrophy if we were ever captured by the enemy. I doubt they anticipated us using the exercises if we were captured by ourselves.

Breathe in. Find your core. Expand your core. Breathe out. Repeat…Repeat…Repeat…Repeat….Repeat. Repeat 100 times.

Next up, if safe, transform into animagus and back without notice. Breathe in. Transform. Stretch, fly, land and transform.

That's another thing everyone learned during the war, animagus training. We were only to use it in extreme circumstances; if the enemy actually saw us transform there went our edge. I was hoping for a cool, magical animal to turn into, but alas, no. Neville ended up being the magical critter in our partnership, not me. My form ended up being a dove. Made a ton of sense after I thought about it, even though I was put off at first. A bird, for how much I like flying, but one that is usually caged against its will and shown off, and let go only when their owners have a point to prove. Very appropriate.

They have special rooms in Azkaban for people they know to be animagi. A mesh on the windows, but not enough room between the grating for anything to pass through and get to the tiny, closed window. Solid stone door only openable by dementors. They did a pretty good job. Took all of our recommendations into account when they opened up the new Azkaban after the third breakout by Death Eaters. How ironic. I had a hand in designing the very security features that are keeping me at bay. Too bad I never expected to end up here, or I would have designed a flaw or two in the cells, or at least tried to convince the team to change their plans.

Our two forms did come in handy a couple of times. My form was much better used for spying than Neville's. I could hide in any natural environment as a dove, but Neville was rather limited as a hippogriff, although we could both fly away from a bad situation when we needed to. No one is terribly sure why Neville ended up as a hippogriff for his animal…he wasn't outwardly immensely proud or easily offended; at least that was the running story. I knew differently as his partner. He was proud and was offended by people rude to him, but he never showed it to anyone. He kept it bottled up, and took it out on whoever we were up against that night, which could also explain why people were so shocked at his viciousness out in the field.

Time for the occlumency. I keep my mind barricaded all times, but it needs to be refreshed every week. Another skill I had to learn on my own. Snape was absolutely no help on that front. It was about the only useful thing I learned that summer between my fifth and sixth years. The shock of Sirius dieing caused me to take stock on my life and, well, looking back on it, start to live up to my potential. I got the books I needed and taught myself occlumency. Shocked the hell out of Snape when not only could he not force himself into my mind, I could easily break into his without a second thought. Best memory of that summer. In order to strengthen the wall I have to bring it down and put it back up again…the only time that Dementors have any sort of effect on me, even though it is slight.

Here we go. Breathe.

_-Harry! What happened to Hermione?_

_She was killed by a vampire, on the way to Voldemort._

_-How could you let her die?_

_-Ron! That's out of line._

_-Shut it Neville. He got my girlfriend killed._

_-Get real Ron. Voldemort killed her, and thanks to Harry he can't kill anyone again._

_I...I can't hear this. Ron, don't blame me for this. I tried...I did...I swear...Please... _

Concentrate. Inner layer first…

_-NOOOOOOO!_

_Neville, it's ok. Can you honestly say you're surprised? You know this whole thing was a sham._

_-Mr. Potter, that's uncalled for. You are guilty of your crimes, and until you show some mercy we shall show you none._

_Oh please Ron. That's a load of crap. And it's Mr. Potter now? Well, you spineless traitor, you will get what's coming to you soon enough._

_-And to top it all off you threaten me? You killed Hermione, you killed Dumbledore, you somehow managed to kill He-who-shall-not-be-name: you are clearly a threat. If anyone is a traitor, it's you. GUARDS! TAKE THIS TREASONOUS BASTARD TO AZKABAN_

And the outer layer is up. Well, those weren't too bad. I've had worse. Those seemed pretty…soft compared to years past. Well, I assume years. Ron looks so much younger in those memories than when he comes and, ugh, visits me. These memories are never that bad, because of my comrade Neville sticking up for me. I'm sure if the dementors, uhm, liked me, that the memories would be much worse that those. Merlin knows I've seen much worse.

Core, check. Dove, check. Occlumency, check. Can't practice wandless magic thanks to the wards on this cell. Ok, that's enough training for the morning.


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: I'm going to attempt the impossible and keep two stories going at once. Wish my luck. I started up a Yahoo Group for both stories, just click the link on my author profile. I've got a new beta reader, Pheobie. She likes this story better than my other one (me too) so hopefully I'll still be cranking out this one when right now my mind is on Betrayal of the Phoenix. And she pointed out both of my stories have the word Betray in it. Whoops! And this story will be getting mighty philosophical and spiritual later in the story. Thought you should know. Also, after the Half Blood Prince comes out, I will change parts of the story that clash with it. Can't do that with my other story, but this one will be HBP compatible. I bet all I'll have to do is change a couple of characters around. This took a while to get out because now that I've decided to make a real fic out of this, I had to get together a viable back story together for many characters and get some major plot things in place and a basic outline together. I also graduated from Georgia Tech, and had to finish up finals and well, celebrating, and finding a job :-) Enough jibber jabber, on we go!

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Betrayed, Used, and Royally Pissed 

By LeTimbo

Chapter 4

There are some days, like today, when I believe that I really do belong here. This suffering, this torment, of being locked up is nothing compared to what I was going through outside Azkaban. The final battle was supposed to be the end of the torment, but in many ways it was only the starting point. After I finally offed Riddle, people began to tell me what they truly thought of me. Ron told me how he was sick of always being in my shadow, Ginny told me she thought I could have finished the job earlier than I had, Lavender told me she would never understand what she saw in me other than my fame, even the twins jumped on the bandwagon, giving me back the thousand galleons I gave them and telling me they should have never accepted money from a dark wizard. As if they were one to talk. Pranks can be funny, but they certainly have some darkness to them. Playing magical tricks on people, especially Muggles, was the first step many of Riddle's supporters took.

But I belong here. I would be lying if I said I never used Dark Magic, but honestly, who hadn't in the war? Using only light magic got many a good wizard killed, and using only dark magic got many a bad wizard killed. It took both light magic and dark acts to kill Riddle in the end: chopping off his head while cleansing his soul. But I did use it and because of that I do belong here in some fashion, but so do a lot of other wizards. I distinctly recall the Minister, Amos Diggory, using a killing curse or two when he was ambushed by Death Eaters. Is he still the minister anyhow?

With the wizarding world beginning to turn against me and my so-called friends betraying me, I was starting to live up to my reputation of being angry and violent towards others and myself. I would snap whenever I saw most of my old friends and the _Daily Prophet_ always seemed to be there when it happened. I even got into a fist fight with Seamus in a pub when he started to proclaim to everyone in the Muggle pub that I was the darkest wizard that had ever lived, who was going to become the next Dark Lord, and that I had tried to use the imperious curse on him to compel him to sleep with me. I chalked the second one up to the large amounts of rum he had consumed, but the first struck a nerve with me, and before I knew it, a full scale barroom brawl had broken out…and I had broken his nose and a couple of other important bones. This was about a week or two before my incarceration and I can see how angry I was getting at the world. I should work on that, but every time I start thinking about being here I flare up in anger. And nothing gets me angrier than one of Ron's visits which, by the indications of the dementors' behavior, is coming sooner rather than later.

There only seems to be two members of the Weasly family left, Charlie and Molly. The others are dead, like Arthur, Percy and Bill, or betrayed the Weasly family name like the twins, Ron and Ginny. You would think that your best friends would actually stick up for you instead of constantly believing the worst about you. And Ginny…I saved her neck more times than I can remember, starting with her first year at Hogwarts. She started treating me normally in fifth year, but I never expected her to treat me like I was evil and about to snap. At the trial she said that I reminded her of Tom Riddle, the diary version that was about to become one of the vilest wizards ever lived not the one that I killed years later. I couldn't even tell if she was telling the truth or not…she must have been trained to have strong enough mental defenses to block me out. She seemed so innocent before the war, but I think that part of what happened in her first year corrupted that innocence…either that or it was all an act. I'll never forget seeing her throw Luna in front of her to take a killing curse. She tried to deny it, sure, but I know what I saw and Neville saw the same. After that she stopped being part of the active combat, claiming that she couldn't work without her partner. I guess she shouldn't have killed her partner if she wanted to keep on fighting.

After that the tensions between us were high – Hermione was still friends with her, but quickly learned not to try and get us to be friends. I was furious with Ginny after the Luna debacle, which she just didn't seem to get. She should not have sacrificed Luna like that…if she had enough time to pull Luna in the way she had enough time to duck. I assume she just panicked. About two months after is when Arthur was killed by Percy and she wanted to blame somebody; she decided that I was the right target. By that time everyone in the Order knew the prophecy and she started to blame me for not going after Riddle sooner and getting her father killed. I think she even blamed me for Percy going dark. As if I had control of that. As for going after Riddle faster, I wanted to, but we had no ways of killing Riddle at the point, so it would have either been a stalemate or I would have been killed. The one time I mounted a serious attempt to go on my own and fight Riddle, Kingsley stopped me before I could leave, and he knew just what I was about to do. Early in the war I took every death personally, but as the war progressed there was just too many deaths. After Hogwarts I was fighting people myself and couldn't take deaths personally anymore. At least that's what the trainers taught us. So she blamed me making those last few years were mightily uncomfortable in HQ.

I think Ron had the same thoughts as Ginny, but I'm pretty sure Hermione calmed him enough to not say anything. After Hermione fell in the final battle, he didn't have any calming force and he exploded, saying that I was evil, that I was the next Voldemort (which was the first time he managed to say his name without stuttering), that I was responsible for not only the deaths of Hermione, Arthur, Percy, Bill and Dumbledore, but would go after him and Ginny next. The two Weaslys were after my head and were the ones that led the charge to throw my ass in jail. They tried me for all sorts of crimes, but by that point I didn't even bother paying attention to the litany…I knew when I was taken into the courtroom that I would be sent to Azkaban. They called me a traitor to the light…what a joke. They are the ones who betrayed their principles and their friend.

I can't believe I gave him a key to the Potter family vault. After Hermione's parents were murdered in seventh year, I decided to give Hermione a key to the Black family vaults, which I was in control of after Sirius was killed and I was of age. I told her that she should feel free to take as much as she needed for her SPEW campaign or whatever else she needed the money before. After Arthur was murdered, it seemed only fair that I give Ron a key to the Potter family vaults, so that his family could keep fighting and surviving after Arthur's death. I'm sure the Potter vaults are completely empty by now and Hermione never really had the chance to use her key.

I was right about Ron's impending visit. It must be the anniversary of my imprisonment. I could tell he was coming before he even stepped foot in the prison. The dementors started to lollygag outside of my cell and I would see an auror every now and then. They had learned not to put aurors I was familiar with on my hall after Ron's first visit when I recognized those that escorted Ron and we got into a minor verbal confrontation. My throat was sore for days afterwards, but they usually are after Ron visits.

"Well, Well, Well Mr. Potter, we meet again." That sneering voice sounded all too familiar. "Is the little traitor insane yet?"

"The little traitor I'm looking at must be insane to be carrying on with this charade."

Ron's face turned red. He is still easy to bait after all of these years, and his face still clashes with his hair. "You will not speak to me like that again."

"Oh who are _you _to be telling me what I can say and what I can't?"

"I'm the Assistant Minister of Magic, that's who."

I snarled externally but grinned internally. Too easy. "Percy's old stomping ground. Should someone warn Molly to watch out?"

I wonder if his head could actually explode from being angry. Maybe I would just hope for a stroke. It drives him even angrier that I'm totally calm talking to him.

"You think you could get out of here and you want to go after my mother? You sick bastard." I rolled my eyes. Sometimes I wish Hermione were here just to act as an interpreter for him, going from grown up talk to the dumbed down version of English that Ron understands.

"I was referring to you, treacherous moron. Why would I go after Molly when her and Charlie are the only ones left in the Weasly family with any sort of redeeming qualities? Arthur would be ashamed of you."

Charlie never believed what Ron, Ginny and the twins were telling him, but he never outwardly spoke up…or if he tried his voice was always drowned out by his siblings. It wasn't news for Charlie to speak up in my defense, but it was special edition worthy for the best friend of Harry Potter to speak up against him with trumped up charges.

"My father is dead because of you and if he were alive he would see you for the Dark Wizard that you are."

"And he would see you for the treacherous rat you are."

"Go to hell Potter. Azkaban is clearly affecting your sanity if you think you are even worthy of talking about my father, much less knowing what he would say. You are the reason he died, the reason my Mum's insane, the reason why my oldest brother is dead AND THE REASON WHY MY GIRLFRIEND WAS MURDERED."

"Your girlfriend had more honor in her pinky than in you and your sister combined. She was more honorable in death than either of you are alive."

"HOW DARE YOU TALK ABOUT MY SISTER!"

"She threw her partner's body in front of her to save her own hide than apparated away out of the battle, leaving all of those muggles to die at the hands of Death Eaters."

"She was trying to save her hide. If you thought about saving people's lives, then you wouldn't be in here you traitor."

"Oh, I never cared about saving people's lives. That's why I saved your sister's life first year, the reason why I even bothered in fighting against Riddle in the first place."

"You fought against Voldemort so you could take his place."

This ticked me off. How could these sheep believe that I wanted to take Riddle's place as the Dark Lord. "What evidence do you have that I would want to ever take Riddle's place? That's ridiculous!"

"You killed him to take over! Why else would you?"

"Maybe to save everyone's lives?" Merciful Merlin, how was I ever friends with this guy. If he's Assistant Minister of Magic…what kind of organization are they running?

"Well you certainly didn't care about saving…"

"Oh shut up already. Why didn't YOU do anything to save Arthur or Bill? You had just as much training as I did you nitwit."

Ron seemed to completely ignore my point and kept ranting. "…when you had the chance and the duty to."

"I had the duty to. Why is that Mr. Self Righteous?" not like I actually expected him to know what that term means.

"The fates decreed it." Ah that damned prophecy once again. Most people in the Order believed it, and it did explain a lot actually, but there was a contingent that saw it as a fake. Some didn't think any prophecies were real and some thought it was just Trelawny. I did believe the prophecy, whether or not it was self-fulfilling, as Hermione swore up and down. Trelawny's prophecy was right about Pettigrew after all, and this had the same creepiness to it.

"As I recall you weren't quite sure that prophecy was indeed real."

"Well, you believed it to be real, and if you took it on your shoulders to save the world then you should have thought about saving Dad and everyone else – they were part of the world too."

"Well that's the first right thing you've said all day. People are part of the world too. Although I doubt that we're living on the same planet…"

"Because you're off in dark bonko world…"

"And you're on self-righteous-jealous-moron-pratland with your dear sister."

"If anybody's jealous it's you. You were always jealous of my family, so you had to kill some of them and destroy my family from the inside. You were jealous of my relationship with Hermione, so you got her killed. Even now you are jealous of my freedom." This did it. This was the final shove over the edge.

"I may be the green-eyed one, but you are clearly the jealous one, which is why you led the fight to throw me in prison, so you could finally come into your own on the front page, with the tell all completely fake story behind the boy-who-lived-to-be-evil to sell to the highest bidder. You got money and fame, something that I think if Riddle ever thought of offering, you would have joined him in a heartbeat…"

"YOU THINK I WOULD HAVE GONE TO RIDDLE!" Ron tried to scream over me but I kept on ranting and rolling…

"…and you found the perfect scapegoat for your precious ministry. The first step in any fascist regime is a communal rallying against a common enemy. After Tom was dead, who still managed to divide Britain fairly effectively, you had to find a new enemy to maintain your power and who better than the guy who killed the evil Voldemort? You got both the Voldemort supporters and the Voldemort haters on the same page, all against Potter. Well newsflash, people will eventually see through this sham and you will be held accountable." Ron looked ready to pull his wand and hex me oblivion, but that would require him to step inside my cell. And I doubt he wants to face me anytime without a 100-person army. I turned my back on him and decided to practice some of my magical training exercises.

I doubt Ron got the whole fascist thing…the only reason why I know about it is Hermione and when we were talking about the neutral problem. She got angry, screamed we were all bloody fascists and stormed out of the meeting. I had no idea what she called me, so she sat me down and explained it all after she had cooled down. She mentioned that rise of Hitler and Grindelwald, and Riddle the first time, involved rallying around a common enemy and seeking to unite society behind getting rid of that enemy. That started to blend the masses together, united by hate, into the fascist machine. Well they had their enemy that united society: me.

As if I wanted to be in a society like that anyhow. Wizarding society has never impressed me that much. What other society idolizes a baby for something that he had no power and no control over? These people stalked me before I even know that wands were real, and these people believed everything they heard about me, good or bad. Who wants to be part of their world when they change their minds based of what people tell them? Who wants to be part of a world that idolizes an infant and automatically reverts to said infant in a time of crisis? Sheep. They're all brainless sheep. Well, that's a little far. Not everyone in the Wizarding world is brainless, just most of them, particularly the British ones.

One Ron visit is all it takes to reaffirm that I do not belong in here. Sure, I have a slight anger problem, but this certainly isn't the place to fix it. Well, it's not really a problem if the anger is directed correctly. Anger directed at Riddle was necessary for the survival of the Wizarding World. But I did get angry with people who didn't really deserve it. Albus? He deserved it more often than not, but once he realized that we were equals in the war and I wasn't automatically subversive to him, then we got along pretty well. My friends rarely deserved it, but every now and then they did. Snape…I remember when I blew up at Snape. He deserved my anger as a student in my early years, but I blew up at him after Hogwarts and I admit he really didn't deserve it.

It was when I was close to breaking after Percy killed Arthur, and Ginny and Ron were blaming me for everything under the sun. We had no warning that Percy was a death eater...he never showed up in my sporadic visions and Snape had never told us. And I wanted to know why he didn't know. He was the spy afterall…

_Snape! WHY THE HELL DIDN'T YOU WARN US ABOUT PERCY?_

_-Potter, it is not my duty to tell you things you should have already known._

_YES it IS your job you git! That's what spies DO!_

_-Did it ever cross your mind that the Dark Lord kept him secret in order to avoid any leaks?_

_Hunh? You didn't know? YOU DIDN'T KNOW? WHY IN THE HELL SHOULD WE BOTHER WITH YOU WHEN YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW WHO ARE DEATHEATERS AND WHO AREN'T?_

_-Mr. Potter you will calm yourself now._

_Shove it Minerva. How many MORE people do you want to die? How are you any less responsible for Arthur's death than Percy?_

_-Or you?_

At that comment I snapped. McGonagall thought I was channeling Riddle but Snape knew that my Occlumency was well beyond that happening again. I was just ticked off and I needed to vent on someone and he was there. I don't think I got the punch in before Hagrid pulled me off of him. I was still struggling, but eventually I was hit with a full body bind…and the whole situation's fuzzy after that.

My relationship with Snape wasn't the same after that…but that's not saying much. Sure after he killed Dumbledore he seemed he was on Riddle's side, but after a few attempts to kill him when he tried to explain himself, I finally listen to what his reasonings - he had to, and Dumbledore wanted it. Dumbledore was on death's door already, Snape not only did him a favor but firmly planted himself in Tommy-boy's inner circle. Still...we were never close, but we did have a working respect after my graduation, before Arthur's murder. After that we just kept away from each other as much as possible until that final week before the last battle. The research team had finally come through with a way to kill Riddle for good and we needed the right set up. The night that Snape was to go to Riddle I kept my mind open and initiated a vision so I could see how it went. Snape was going to feed Riddle misinformation to lead him into the battle, but Riddle expected something was up and Riddle had the perfect punishment in mind. Snape was always teased about being a vampire and this constant teasing eventually caused Snape's dislike of vampires to become a fear of them. Riddle knew this and had Snape turned that night. It was gruesome to watch…

Snape was able to make it out after that and came back to HQ. Albus whisked him off to St. Mungos and I never saw Snape again. The War ended a week later, after we stormed Riddle's HQ. After that the Order was disbanded, so I never saw him at a meeting, and why would I voluntarily see him again? A couple of months later I was thrown in here and certainly did not see him at my trial, which surprised me. I thought he would have showed up just to laugh at me.

Clang

The sound of the evening bowl of water. They give us water twice a day and bread only in the morning. Yelling at Ron made my throat pretty dry, so I grabbed the bowl, which immediately warmed to my touch…that normally doesn't happen…and what's that feeling? It feels familiar…wait…what the…


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: Half this chapter was written a year ago. The rest this evening. Trying to get back into it. And with it we have a change in format. Actions and whatnot will be third person. We still get Harry's thoughts, which now will be in italics (or explained in the authors notes.) No beta, so pardon the mistakes.

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Betrayed, Used and Royally Pissed  
Chapter 5  
By LeTimbo

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_From Last Time..._

_Clang The sound of the evening bowl of water. They give us water twice a day and bread only in the morning. Yelling at Ron made my throat pretty dry, so I grabbed the bowl, which immediately warmed to my touch…That normally doesn't happen…and what's that feeling? It feels familiar…wait…what the…_

That familiar feeling turned out to be an all too familiar feeling – the same feeling that one of the special Watches had when the new portkey destination had been programmed.

_Uhh...hunh? Did I imagine that? Is my water bowl now a portkey? What? How? More importantly, who? Did Ron do this? Is this a big elaborate plan to have me try and escape only to be portkeyed into a room of Aurors and be arrested for trying to escape? Wait, why would they do that...I'm sure I'm locked up in here forever, why add more years to the sentence...and would Ron even be capable of making up a plan like that? Hardly. Should I assume it's the same activation as my Watch? One way to find out..._

"Padfoot," Harry barely whispered, but it was enough for the bowl of water. The next few moments seemed to slow down and take an eternity for Harry. The portkey began to warm up again and started to flash dimly, as if it were desperately trying to not call attention to itself. He slowly began to feel a tug on his stomach, which progressed as the portkey got warmer. Finally, Harry felt his entire body being pulled with the portkey, and his surroundings were moving from cold and damp to warm and blindingly light?

"What the hell? Where the hell? I can't see a bloody thing. Am I really out of Azkaban or is this an elaborate hoax or a hallucination…"

"Harry…"

_I know that voice. That's Cho Chang. She used to work in our Research Division, which explains the portkey that resembled one of the Watches...she was probably one of the ones who helped develop them. Too bad I can't see a damn thing. Hearing her voice confirms that this isn't a hallucination. But what is happening?_

"Did you drink any of the water?"

"Uh, no? Why ask me such a blod…"

"Hold on. **Aqua Sperao Infinitum Portus Tous Multiplicitious.**" At the last word of the long spell Cho uttered, she grabbed onto the same bowl as Harry, who was clutching onto the bowl as if it were the only thing he recognized. Cho threw an invisibility cloak over Harry and muttered "Totalous Activate." Harry noticed the water slowly disappearing, followed by the familiar tug on his navel. Harry tried to speak, but found himself in the middle of being portkeyed once again, and he long since learned to keep ones mouth closed while in magical transportation.

Harry and Cho arrived in what Harry guessed to be a London Tube station, which certainly helped Harry's eyes. Harry immediately saw Theodore Nott walking forcibly calmly towards Cho, and Harry knew for certain that he was free.

Very few people ever knew of the role Theodore Nott played in the final war against Voldemort, and only Harry and Neville really knew the magnitude to which Nott helped. Nott didn't trust Dumbledore and certainly didn't trust the ministry, but he knew that the side that his own father fought on was doomed, and that Harry would triumph over Voldemort. He agreed with Voldemort's supposed goals, pulling back the muggleborn influence on the wizarding world, but refused to kill anyone to enact the goals, and saw all murder as generally…distasteful.

Cho nodded slightly at Theodore, and two subways pulled up at the same time, one on each of the tracks going opposite directions. Cho walked calmly to the northbound train while Theodore poked Harry and whispered, "follow me Harry" while pretending to tie his shoe. Theodore walked to the southbound train, and Harry had no choice but to follow. Theodore almost imperceptibly guided Harry to a seat, with Theodore sitting on the aisle.

_Ok, I realize we have to keep it under wraps that I got out of Azkaban, but I need some answers damn it! I'm bloody confused and would really appreciate being in the loop right about now! And it's a bloody good thing that the train is fairly empty, because I would love to see the reaction if someone sat down on me under an invisibility cloak. And why is Teddy lifting up the edge of my cloak? Does he want me to take it off? These people just put it on! Wait, what was that? Did he leave something on my leg?_

Harry looked down at his leg, still underneath the invisibility cloak, and saw a small piece of parchment.

Harry –

Whatever you do, don't leave this behind! Slip it back to me after you're done reading. I'm sure you have millions of questions, which we will try to answer. We're going to my pub, Potent Potables, located on Knockturn Alley. We're going through a back entrance that I installed months ago in one of the Tube stations, but kept it and the room we're going to under the Fidelus Charm. Memorize the following statement:

"Shelter can be found in Potent Potables by going through the West End Door and climbing two flights of stairs to the back entrance to Potters Post-breakout Palace."

-Theodore

Harry did as the parchment instructed, and slid the piece back to Theodore, who took the parchment gently and sliding it back into his coat pocket. Before Harry realized it, they had arrived at West End station. Harry stood up and continued to follow Theodore, who walked underneath the stairs that led out of the station. Theodore turned and nodded to Harry, then promptly disappeared. Harry knew it was time to concentrate on what he had read.

_Shelter can be found in Potent Potables by going through the West End Door and climbing two flights of stairs to the back entrance to Potters Post-breakout Palace._ _So Teddy has his own pub and inn now. I assume he has rooms for rent too. At least he seems to have done well for himself after the war. Climb two flights of stairs, and, surprise, once again a dead end. Concentrate Harry. Shelter can be found in Potent Potables by going through the West End Door and climbing two flights of stairs to the back entrance to Potters Post-breakout Palace. Ah ha, the door finally appeared. They'd, whoever they are, better start answering some questions!_

The room was nothing out of the ordinary for a normal inn, only exception being the presence of several books, maps, and an escaped prisoner from a wizarding prison. The room had muted greens and blacks, complemented by silver all, throughout the room, fitting for a Slytherin owner. There were no portraits in the room, but the walls were intricately painted with a mountain landscape. What delighted Harry, besides the table of food he spotted, was the presence of three people he never thought he would see again.

"Neville! Susan! Theodore! What did you get yourselves into?"

"Harry!" Neville leaped up from his chair and tackled Harry to the ground, much to the amazement of Harry and to the amusement of Susan and Theodore. "Partner, I'm sorry I couldn't keep you out of there…and that we couldn't have gotten you out sooner."

"How did you get me out anyways? What year is it, and what are you all doing here, and where is here anyways? I'm just so…disoriented. I'm not sure this isn't even a dream or something."

At this, Neville slapped Harry upside the head. "Nope, not a dream. You woulda waken up after that." Harry mock glared at Neville, who cracked a grin, before his face turned serious again. "We've got a lot to go over Harry, but unfortunately I can't be here right now. As soon as word gets out that you've escaped, I'll be the first person they'd suspect. I have to get back to Beauxbatons and be seen immediately."

"I understand partner."

"When the immediate fury has died down some, and before you head out, I'll see you again."

Neville apparated while Harry was in the middle of asking, "Wait, what do you mean before I head out?" Theodore and Susan glanced at each other, silently urging the other to start the explanations. Susan apparently was the one out maneuvered, and began to speak.

"Harry...at the same time a lot has happened since you went to Azkaban, and yet it seems almost everything's the same. Diggory is still Minister, but he's obsessed with catching everybody and everything dark..."

Theodore snorted. "Yah mate, they threw me in Azkaban for a good six months after they had thrown you in there. They executed my dad for being a Death Eater, and then arrested me after the will was executed for having dark artifacts in my possession. Like I had anytime to get rid of them after Dad left them to me. Ruddy obvious they had my name down and were waiting for the opportunity."

Harry had a look of confusion on his face. "I don't recall ever seeing you in there."

Susan spoke up at this. "You wouldn't have. You were in a specially warded confinement area apart from the less dangerous criminals."

Harry raised his eyebrows. "And how do you know that?"

"I'm an auror Harry. More on that later. Anywho, picking up where I was interrupted," Susan shot a grin at Theodore, "Minister Diggory was throwing all sorts of people in jail, egged on by Ron Weasly. They invoked and still do invoke your name for the purposes of national unity. They seem top have convinced themselves that they have convinced everyone that you are a common enemy. Granted, most of Britain seems to think that, but not very many outside of Britain do. The Ministry withdrew from the International Confederation of Wizards, and a couple of places even severed diplomatic ties with our ministry. Of course, none of this ever made the papers, but that didn't stop the word from spreading. It was mostly smaller countries that severed ties. The most notable was the Tibetan Ministry of Magic."

Susan paused to drink some water. Well, Harry assumed it was water. It might have been a clear beverage of a different sort. Theodore picked up the debriefing.

"They called the Minister out on the, what did they call it…'frightening fall into fascism.'"

"Harry, no one's free anymore. Weasley's turned the once-famed Order into his private secret police. Magical creatures have few rights if any - and new laws are passed by Diggory every day limiting more freedoms. All in the name of fighting any remnants of the Dark Times."

"They seem to be starting a whole new era of darkness."

"Which is why we banded together to break you out of Azkaban."

Harry started to get angry. "Did you break me out just to have me lead another war?"

Susan paled. "Nononono Harry. That's not what I intended, and none of us certainly expect it after the way you've been treated. Some day this corrupt ministry will be overthrown, but you certainly don't have to be the one to do it. We wanted to right a wrong and strike a blow against the ministry."

"Don't you think that the Minister will simply use my escape as a further reason to take away freedom?"

Susan paled again. This time Theodore joined her. "Ok. So maybe we hadn't hit that point in our planning."

Harry grinned. It was time to let her off the hook. "I'm not angry Susan. Thanks for getting me out of there. What matters most to me is that people still care. Why are people staying around and putting up with this?"

"Most of the magical creatures have left Britain already. Some new school in Transylvania opened up just to train part humanoids."

"Part Humanoids?

"You know…vampires, werewolves, veela, and others that have close to human or above human intelligence who find themselves magical. That's going to be one stop on your journey."

"Wait…Transylvania's real?"

Nott snorted. "They broke away from Romania a couple years back. There's a lot more you need to be aware of about the Muggle world since you went into Azkaban."

_A lot of stuff has changed in a few years. Geesh. Teddy wasn't kidding. I feel funny that they've got stops planned out for me on whatever journey they are sending me on. Now sure, I admit I need to get out of here, not just for my safety and other's safety, but for my sanity. It's been so long since I've used magic, and even though my exercises have kept me in shape it hasn't kept my mind in shape. But the thought that my life is being planned out for me I find distressing._

_At least there's no set time frame for each spot. But I need to get moving - they likely won't discover I'm gone for a couple of days - probably until Weasley's next visit. I need to get supplies, money, and head down to the continent._

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A/n Part Two: So. Was it worth it, or should I just give up? 


End file.
